Category Archives: Musings with Mae

Oh, I forgot

Dear Life,

I was awakened from a deep slumber at 1 AM by my daughter’s cry and mumbling of something troubling her.  I walked into her room, rubbed her back as I stated soothingly “Shh, it’s okay Mae.  Mommy’s here, it was just a dream.” In true EllaMae fashion still in a confused slumbering state, she wittingly replied “oh, I forgot” and peacefully fell back to sleep.

As I returned to my bed chuckling I thought about how often I have forgotten what life is really like.  This blog is one stunning example of that.  The vision of this blog and several other of my endeavors has been with the best intentions to document life…notice a few gaps.  My son is 5 and my daughter is 3, and baby 3 is on the way.  You know what I forgot about? When I was up every 2-3 hours a night to feed the kids.  How my son would beg for me to sleep with him throughout the night or lay with him until he fell asleep (he still appreciates it when I do). How my daughter would sing herself silly trying to avoid sleeping (still does) and we would come down into the living room and dance to Christina Perri playlist on pandora with all the lights off in the house. How I would often crawl into bed with my kids so they could calm me and help me relax on a night when sleep wasn’t on my side.  Or, how before I had children I was up often at 2 AM with trouble sleeping and I would then get creative and do a project only to be interrupted at 7 AM with the need to go to work…you know my real job.  I forgot how after the kids went to bed I would take to the computer in obligation to create my next post, plan my next social media strategy or edit a batch of clients proofs.  These all seem like fleeting memories now.  

Perhaps it’s me avoiding the guilt, or perhaps it’s simply a feeling of content.  I fall asleep each night with relatively low level of anxiety, I often have the luxury to put both of my children to bed, then come back hours later kiss their cheeks, watch them sleep, and encourage them to “dream big.” While I may stink at documenting and sharing our life stories of the past few years, it’s moments like tonight when I remember how much I really do enjoy life.

When I rolled over at 2:30 AM, still unable to fall back to sleep, I decided to crawl into my daughters single bed attempting to snuggle her along with her 3 pillows, 4 cozy blankets (these are all separate blankets she requires, not the actual bedding) Willy the orca, Diego the seal, and my daughter flailed out across the bed.  As I crawled under the covers the baseball from spring break vacation found it’s way into my thigh and I pressed my 25 week pregnant body into a sliver of available space.  (Are you getting this visual- sounds relaxing doesn’t it?) I rubbed her head streaking the hair away from her face and watched in admiration of this beautiful girl sleeping peacefully.  I placed my arm around her chest snuggling her in close.  I could feel her heart beating in her chest and the rhythm of her breathing slowly calm me.  She rolled from her side to her back and placed both hands behind her head.  I remembered both of my littles as babies would sleep with their hands behind their head.  I always appreciated that and recalled someone saying “that’s a sign they are content.” I always followed it up by saying “this is the life?!”

Thank you EllaMae, for reminding me at 1 AM that we have a pretty sweet life.  I sometimes forget those little things.

Love,
Mom 🙂

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Filed under Daily Grind, Deep thoughts, Musings with Mae, Proud Parents

Motherhood Musings

Delayed Posted started February 6, 2014…see disclaimer

The daily routines of being a mom are not typically something I would write home about.  Our life is filled with amusement, yet nothing I would assume out of the ordinary from any proud-mom who balances a professional and personal life amidst crazy family schedules, and finding sanity between the wee hours of sleep.  This isn’t extraordinary, its just our new normal.  Although these little ones have a way of throwing you for a loop and capturing the moments that shape our life story.

Its been a few months since I’ve paid tribute to the life of a vivacious little woman.  The development of my now 21-month-old daughter over the past few months has me in giggles and tears on a regular basis.  She has the tenacity of a lion, and her sweet tender face pops up whenever I hear Katy Perry’s “Roar” and then turns around and melts your heart with her sweetness.  Her consistently furrowed brow might confuse you that she’s concerned or angry (trust me you KNOW when she is angry), most frequently it is evidence that she is thinking or studying (IE: people watching).  The gawking gift must be a hereditary trait that skips a generation.  Between her temper, stubbornness, and determination I often wonder how a girl of such stature can run the house the way she does.  Appears I have either a role model or a nightmare amidst my presence! 🙂

Little-d-Tales: YIR 2013 &emdash; IMG_3409

While her facial expression might catch you off guard, her vocabulary and statements will put you in stitches.  The beauty of the second child is that the first feels a responsibility for teaching them lots of things (both good and bad).  Through Little Man’s learning he has passed on the ABC song to his sister, as she sings a long with considerable accuracy to the ABC’s when sung.  Observation is her key source of learning words, skills, or gathering ideas for 10 second activities.  She frequently is seen admiring the works and speech of her older brother and attempts her version.  Not uncommon for me to hear “mom, mom, mom…(pause) HEIDI” when she’s frustrated by whatever is distracting my attention away from her.  She answers questions like an adult often with “I good”, or “I (d)on(‘t) know; ” unresponsive requests result in her running to you to grabbing your hand with a nudging “come;” she giggles and announces when she farts and when instructed to say “excuse me,” she response by saying “burp.”   She has even taken to imitating the dog by attempting to pick a variety of toys with her mouth, and I mean all of her toys.  She’ll sometimes carry dolls the size of her by her teeth, balls, and even some of Little Man’s stray cars or other various toys end up between the teeth of my little “puppy.”

Little-d-Tales: YIR 2013 &emdash; IMG_0577     Little-d-Tales: YIR 2013 &emdash; IMG_1039

It’s hard to believe almost a year ago she was sporting some incredible rolls.  Her inside name was “Princess Round Face” and the definition of her bones and muscles were very lovable and undefined.  Since walking at 9-months there is little of the round face remaining.  I chuckled as her horse-riding legs would run sprints in excitement.  Her legs are straightening and she is just now growing out of the 18 months clothing that she wore last winter.  Her steady growth chart has leveled and the percentile between height and weight have swapped spots.  We’ve never had to worry about her eating habits as broccoli remains a top favorite.  From splashing in pools to our current swimming lessons she seeks adventure ON HER TERMS, as she doesn’t rest for long.  I love coming home and surprising them, finding them entranced in some obscure yet riveting task OR the sneaking surprise that I’m home and an instantaneous party occurs!

Little-d-Tales: YIR 2013 &emdash; IMG_9958  Little-d-Tales: YIR 2013 &emdash; IMG_1502

 

Life certainly is not a walk in the park, but it is one hell of a fun ride.  The best words I can use to describe her are:  Full of Spunk! When I reflect on our nearly 2 years, I think how boring our life must have been before, and what education I’ll gain from being her mom.  Who knows where we will be 20 years from now.  I don’t think I’ll  win any notorious awards, or add any credentials behind my name simply by being her mom.  It will however, provide some eclectic experiences and bring a sense of joy that no PhD, Nobel Peace Prize or Gold Medal could bring.  It comes with a gentle hug each night and sing-song voice that says “la do” to which I can respond…Love you more!

Dream Big Little One 🙂
mom, aka HEIDI (yes, I’m yelling).

Disclaimer: Blogging happens at home, at night when I feel like it.  I am persistent that blogging is not allowed to get in the way of my life.  My theory is I sit behind a computer most of the day at work, when I’m home I have 3 hours of active family time before the kids go to bed.  The bedtime routine often includes me falling asleep as I lay with my children, convincing them it’s cool to fall asleep at 8 PM.  On the nights I’m actually awake after 10 PM, it’s power hour for me.  My most productive hours are between 10 PM and 12 AM.  My husband on the other hand turns into a pumpkin.  I started this post at 10:47 PM.  By the time I gathered some intellectual thoughts, found the pictures, a child started crying and blogging for the night ceased.  I came back one month later with another blog idea, and realized I never finished the first thought.  I had the best intentions of completing both posts.  Repeat steps 1 and 2 above and I now have 2 incomplete blog posts.  The likelihood of feeling creative and inspired to sit down at a computer is seldom. Hence another month passes, repeat steps 2, 3, and 4 and I realize I need a support group for bloggers anonymous, have deemed creative pinterest moms with 7 kids smoke crack in their free time and secretly hire someone else to make their life look perfect and instill guilt into any mom that doesn’t hire a graphic designer for their children’s birthday invites! Alas- I’m here completing a post that I will appreciate some day, and will have no idea why the 21-month-old post was almost 2 months after her 2nd birthday?!  I know how I feel about the mom’s that track the months after their child turns a year anyway. Meh, I’m still enjoying life (na-na-na-na-boo-boo)!

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Filed under Musings with Mae, Random thoughts

Mighty Mae: Reflection of 1-year

Dearest EllaMae (MaeMae),

12moCollage

A day as your mother is unpredictable, enlightening, adventurous, and sometime nerve-wracking.  You are a girl who is driven to do whatever she puts her mind to.  Your determination, sense of humor, and flexibility will serve you well, as you have already proven to have won the hearts of a few boys and one proud mom!  On the eve of your first birthday I reflect and capture the moments that have and will continue to shape our family story with EllaMae as the newest character.

The name EllaMae reminded me of a graceful, poignant, and sweet little girl.  Well, 1 for 3 ain’t bad I guess (Amazingly Sweet). Your personality and physique have drawn a different picture of you as a determined, head-strong, and less than delicate little princess.  Amazingly this “princess round-face” can light up a room and turns heads at locations throughout the city.  Your sincere eyes, vivacious smile and layers of love have friends, family (and even strangers) are drawn to your charismatic personality.  Your daycare friends have renamed you to “MaeMae” and the name has stuck.  Most recently, your curious and destructive nature have given you the title of “Mighty Mae.”

Having done the whole motherhood level 3 thing with your brother, I felt a bit more prepared this time.  As ignorance would have it, while you and your brother have some similarities, your differences will rival my plans.  You never took a Nuk, and no need for a mute button.  You were smart enough to know what was food, and what was just a hunk of plastic in your mouth.  As with eating there was really no reason to rely on others.  Taking things off people’s plates, spoons, or drinking from your brothers cup as needed are standard operating procedures in your manual.  Utensils are over-rated unless there is ice cream involved, in which case a few drips to the chin determine your plan of action.  Sitting (3 months), Crawling (6 months) walking (10 months), and now running, climbing all happened on a similar timeline.  However you have been able to stand from a sit without using your hands to brace or support you for quite some time.  A task many adults still struggle with.  You seem to have a considerable amount of coordination catching and balancing yourself despite obstacles that attempt to take you out at the knees.  Talented yes, although simply looking down on occasion might serve you well, or at least protect your shins from bruises!

Eating is a sport, as is riding the dog.  Both bring great joy.  Adding to the list pulling the recyclables out of the bin, climbing stairs while mom and dad aren’t looking, and bouncing to music are gaining momentum.  Most of all  you are a sincerely sweet, and entertaining little girl.  You have won the hearts and taught me lessons I didn’t know I was lacking.  You inspire me everyday to a better person, and recognize that fashion and hair accessories are over-rated.

So on this April 11th eve of 2013, I wish you many sweet dreams.  As we would typically sing (to the tune of hot-cross buns)

“EllaMae, EllaMae,
How are you, How are you?
Mommy Loves you so much, Mommy Loves you so much
Yes I do, Yes I do!

Dream big little one.
Love you more,

Mom 🙂

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Filed under Musings with Mae, Proud Parents